An Addicted Partner – 4 Effective Coping Strategies

An Addicted Partner – 4 Effective Coping Strategies

Living with a romantic partner who is addicted to drugs and alcohol and actively using is a difficult experience. Your partner is likely to put you on the backburner while pursuing the next high, and may not be fully present emotionally in the relationship. Often, the term codependent is used to describe some of the shared character traits and behaviors of the partners of addicts. These can include excessive caretaking tendencies, overtolerance of bad behavior in your partner, and anger and feelings of martyrdom that arise out of a failure to control your partner. Here are 4 coping strategies that may help you in dealing with life with an addict.

1. Talking things out with a counselor. It can be very helpful to work with someone who specializes in addiction issues, to help you sort out your own issues in the context of your relationship.

2. Joining a sustain group for partners of addicts. Al-Anon is a great, free resource for those who are involved as a friend, family member, or partner of an alcoholic. Finding a group of people who you can proportion with, who understand exactly what you are going by, can be an highly useful resource.

3. Stop bailing your partner out, assuming responsibility for failed commitments, and making excuses for his or her bad behavior. The dynamic in which your partner uses, messes up, and you rescue does not serve either of you. If your partner doesn’t confront consequences, he or she has little motivation to change. In addition, following the same patterns doesn’t give you the opportunity to address your own issues either.

4. Begin focusing on your hopes, dreams, and plans for yourself. It is easy to allow your life to revolve around your partner’s issues with drugs or alcohol, but try focusing away from that and thinking about who you are, what will fulfill you, what goals and aspirations you have for yourself.

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